I've heard so many times that there is no such thing as a soulmate. I don't think that's true. Personally, I know it's not. I have my soulmate and yes, I pretty much knew right away. Something just clicked. It's been five years since and we're five years older, but I still am as crazy about him as I was when I first started dating him.
Romance is a product of the people in the relationship. From my experience, if you're with the wrong person, the romance or the connection is going to be dead or will be dead soon enough. Chemistry cannot last alone. Mutual respect, affection and communication are absolutely the key to maintaining a romantic relationship.
I wish people (men and women) would take direction from romance novels. If you're with the wrong person, those big three--mutual respect, affection and communication-- are not possible to achieve. Romance novels get it right because those three items are always at center stage. The main characters have crazy attraction, support one another through big career moves and the challenges of relationships and they don't beat around the bush.
The wrong person could have respect for you and the affection could be there, but communication in the relationship is failing. The problem is this: people have a hard time letting each other know what's going on with them and how they're feeling.
I don't understand that.
Why do people make themselves miserable by hiding their feelings or stifling them? If they're not happy with the relationship, they should just say so and work to fix it or end it. They shouldn't cheat and cover their asses after the fact. If people just said what they meant instead of telling little white lies, the world would be much less complicated.
The "take no bullshit" aspect is why I love romance novels. The female character is on equal par with the male. She knows what she wants and she isn't afraid of getting that. She wants to be with that male character and she wants to work for it as hard as he does. She doesn't take his bullshit. At the same time, the male character is crazy about her and wants to work for the relationship.
I hope the concept of soulmates comes back. Everyone should have a chance at love, but in order to get that everyone need to raise their standards, stop hiding their feelings and start being honest with themselves first.